list mania

By heather | January 2, 2008

Things I Did Not Accomplish Over Break:

Moving the blog. I finally have a new domain name, but need to do the header and all that. Wanting to be a little more anonymous, my goal was to have the new one running by 1 Jan. First New Year’s Resolution, down the drain.
Clean out our junk room to turn it into a lovely, relaxing, work-from-home office.
Set up the gazillion terabyte backup external hard drive and actually back my crap up.
Cleaning the house in any way, shape or form.
And on a related note, combating the mildew in my bathroom. Still scary.
Controlling my eating. It’s like I have a tapeworm.
Exercising. Yeah.
Posting Christmas pictures. I mean really, there is only so much time to accomplish, well, nothing on this list.

Things I Learned Over the Past 10 Days:

I miss snow, but am damn glad to drive out of it.
You can only drop a camera so many times before you will have to buy a new one. Which is OK, because I kind of wanted a new one anyway.
Brett knew I secretly wanted a GPS for Christmas because I GOT ONE!! Yay!
My hometown newspaper has an unintentionally hilarious feature called “Reader Rants”. The rants are usually poorly written, often misinformed and completely random. My particular favorite this past week was from a woman raving that someone had taken her lighted reindeer on the lawn and posed them in “perverted positions“, thus ruining her Christmas.
I am so glad to see the back end of the holidays. Exhale.
The smell of chicken disgusts me, which is weird because I normally eat it 2 or 3 times a week.
I am completely exhausted to the point that I cannot get off the couch.
I suddenly have a sense of smell equivalent to a bloodhound and can smell someone’s breath from 30 feet away. (Do you know where this is going yet? Do ya?)
I do not know how to calculate fertility windows as well as I thought I did, in fact I’ve been doing it completely wrong (information which would have been good to have LAST MONTH) which is why…
I am pregnant again. Unplanned. Again. Surprise! (And OK, I did not just learn this in the last 10 days but we had to tell all the real people before the Internet.)

Following that revelation…More Things I Learned:

Unpacking maternity clothes does not hold any of the appeal of unpacking your summer or winter clothes. They still suck.
I have not gained 10 pounds, I AM PREGNANT. Which equals a license to continue to eat whatever I want.
This time around, I have a completely cavalier attitude about it, unless I need something. Then it’s, “Oh pleeeaazze do this for me, I just can’t, I’m pregnant you see.”
My pre-natal vitamins are bigger than the baby.
I have not consulted “What to Expect” or any type of pregnancy publication because…whatever. See you in July, Baby 2.0. Let me know if you need anything in the meantime.
I will not immediately drop dead if I eat lunchmeat that hasn’t been microwaved into jerky. (For those confused by this, I and about half my friends were told not to eat lunchmeat when they were pregnant unless they heated it to kill things. Since the other half had no such instruction, I’m going over there where the grass is green and the deli meat is cold.)

Things I REALLY Have To Do Now:

Clean out our junk room so that we can have another bedroom. (Bye bye spacious office.) Picture a room, filled wall to wall and halfway to the ceiling with everything from a rickety futon to broken electronics, assorted baby stuff that was headed for the attic but will now be remaining downstairs, Pampers boxes filled with paper to shred, an empty bookshelf, etc, etc. My God.
Take a nap.

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